为什么我们只把焦点放在负面情绪上呢? 是因为,多数人一般不需要任何管理正面情绪的方法 。归根结底,开心、激动、同情、或者乐观的情绪通常是不会对他人产生负面影响的。只要您建设性地、专业性地能够与他人分享正面的情绪,那么他们在职场中的力量是非常巨大的!
1997年, 邦德大学的管理学教授辛西亚•费舍尔进行了一项研究，名称为“职场中的情绪: 人们感觉到什么,以及我们应该如何衡量?”
与越来越多的裁员人数随之而来的是害怕与焦虑,无庸置疑，许多人都会担心他们的工作。但是这种担心也很容易失控,如果您任其泛滥的话, 这种情绪不仅会对您的心理健康带来冲击,它还会影响您的工作效率, 以及您承担有风险性的工作的意愿。
不要让您自己被担心和焦虑所包围----例如, 如果公司的同事聚集在休息室闲聊谈论裁员的事情, 那时您就别前去凑热闹了也不必和他们一起担心。担心往往会引发更多的担心,而那样做对任何人都没有好处。
把您的担心写入担心日志----如果您发现担心这种情绪在您的大脑里横冲直撞,那么就把它们记录在笔记本或是“担心日志”上，然后再计划一个时间进行处理。在那个您所计划的时间之前,您可以先把这些担心的情绪搁置一边,因为您心理清楚您会来处理的。当您所计划的时间到了以后, 您对这些担心进行一个合适的风险分析, 而且做好所需的任何措施以降低风险。
当您担心并紧张某件事情的时候, 它会削弱您的自信心。请阅读我们有关 建立自信心的文章以确保这样的情况不会发生。另外, 不要让您的担忧妨碍您建立恰如其分的自信.
留意愤怒的早期信号----当愤怒的情绪已经出现的时候只有您自己知道这个危险的信号,所以，您要在这种情绪开始的时候就认识到。在起初的时候就把愤怒的情绪进行阻止是非常关键的 。请记住，面对一种情境的时候您可以选择如何作出反应。仅仅因为您的第一直觉就是愤怒并非意味着这个反应就是正确的 。
想要了解更多的办法来管理您职场中愤怒的情绪，请做一份我们为您准备的自测题您的愤怒管理做得如何?另外，请阅读 处理不公平的批评和 愤怒管理。
想要学习更多如何与职场中讨厌的人相处的办法，请看我们的与难以相处的人打交道 和 职场中的自尊心。
Managing Your Emotions at Work
Controlling Your Feelings... Before They Control You
verything can be taken from a man but the last of human freedoms – the ability to choose one's attitude in a given set of circumstances, to choose one's way.
Viktor Frankl, 'Man's Search for Meaning'
We've all been in one of 'those' situations before. You know... when your favorite project is cancelled after weeks of hard work; when a customer snaps at you unfairly; when your best friend (and co-worker) is laid off suddenly; or your boss assigns you more work when you're already overloaded.
In your personal life, your reaction to stressful situations like these might be to start shouting, or to go hide in a corner and feel sorry for yourself for a while. But at work, these types of behavior could seriously harm your professional reputation, as well as your productivity.
Stressful situations are all too common in a workplace that's facing budget cuts, staff layoffs, and department changes. It may become harder and harder to manage your emotions under these circumstances, but it's even more important for you to do so. After all, if management is forced into making more layoffs, they may choose to keep those who can handle their emotions, and work well under pressure. As the above quote shows, no matter what the situation is, you're always free to choose how you react to it.
So, how can you become better at handling your emotions, and 'choosing' your reactions to bad situations? In this article, we look at the most common negative emotions experienced in the workplace – and how you can manage them productively.
Why are we focusing only on negative emotions? Well, most people don't need strategies for managing their positive emotions. After all, feelings of joy, excitement, compassion, or optimism usually don't affect others in a negative way. As long as you share positive emotions constructively and professionally, they're great to have in the workplace!
Common Negative Emotions at Work
In 1997, Bond University professor of management Cynthia Fisher conducted a study called 'Emotions at Work: What Do People Feel, and How Should We Measure It?'
According to Fisher's research, the most common negative emotions experienced in the workplace are as follows:
Below are different strategies you can use to help you deal with each of these negative emotions.
Frustration usually occurs when you feel stuck or trapped, or unable to move forward in some way. It could be caused by a colleague blocking your favorite project, a boss who is too disorganized to get to your meeting on time, or simply being on hold on the phone for a long time.
Whatever the reason, it's important to deal with feelings of frustration quickly, because they can easily lead to more negative emotions, such as anger.
Here are some suggestions for dealing with frustration:
Stop and evaluate – One of the best things you can do is mentally stop yourself, and look at the situation. Ask yourself why you feel frustrated. Write it down, and be specific. Then think of one positive thing about your current situation. For instance, if your boss is late for your meeting, then you have more time to prepare. Or, you could use this time to relax a little.
Find something positive about the situation – Thinking about a positive aspect of your situation often makes you look at things in a different way. This small change in your thinking can improve your mood. When it's people who are causing your frustration, they're probably not doing it deliberately to annoy you. And if it's a thing that's bothering you – well, it's certainly not personal! Don't get mad, just move on.
Remember the last time you felt frustrated – The last time you were frustrated about something, the situation probably worked out just fine after a while, right? Your feelings of frustration or irritation probably didn't do much to solve the problem then, which means they're not doing anything for you right now.
With all the fear and anxiety that comes with increasing numbers of layoffs, it's no wonder that many people worry about their jobs. But this worry can easily get out of control, if you allow it, and this can impact not only your mental health, but also your productivity, and your willingness to take risks at work.
Try these tips to deal with worrying:
Don't surround yourself with worry and anxiety – For example, if co-workers gather in the break room to gossip and talk about job cuts, then don't go there and worry with everyone else. Worrying tends to lead to more worrying, and that isn't good for anyone
Try deep-breathing exercises – This helps slow your breathing and your heart rate. Breathe in slowly for five seconds, then breathe out slowly for five seconds. Focus on your breathing, and nothing else. Do this at least five times. For more on this, read Physical Relaxation Techniques.
Focus on how to improve the situation – If you fear being laid off, and you sit there and worry, that probably won't help you keep your job. Instead, why not brainstorm ways to bring in more business, and show how valuable you are to the company?
Write down your worries in a worry log – If you find that worries are churning around inside your mind, write them down in a notebook or 'worry log,' and then schedule a time to deal with them. Before that time, you can forget about these worries, knowing that you'll deal with them. When it comes to the time you've scheduled, conduct a proper risk analysis around these things, and take whatever actions are necessary to mitigate any risks.
When you're worried and nervous about something, it can dent your self-confidence. Read our article on Building Self-Confidence to make sure this doesn't happen. Also, don't let your worries get in the way of being appropriately assertive.
Out-of-control anger is perhaps the most destructive emotion that people experience in the workplace. It's also the emotion that most of us don't handle very well. If you have trouble managing your temper at work, then learning to control it is one of the best things you can do if you want to keep your job.
Try these suggestions to control your anger:
Watch for early signs of anger – Only you know the danger signs when anger is building, so learn to recognize them when they begin. Stopping your anger early is key. Remember, you can choose how you react in a situation. Just because your first instinct is to become angry doesn't mean it's the correct response.
If you start to get angry, stop what you're doing – Close your eyes, and practice the deep-breathing exercise we described earlier. This interrupts your angry thoughts, and it helps put you back on a more positive path
Picture yourself when you're angry – If you imagine how you look and behave while you're angry, it gives you some perspective on the situation. For instance, if you're about to shout at your co-worker, imagine how you would look. Is your face red? Are you waving your arms around? Would you want to work with someone like that? Probably not.
Your Anger Management? Also, read Dealing with Unfair Criticism and Anger Management.
We've probably all had to work with someone we don't like. But it's important to be professional, no matter what.
Here are some ideas for working with people you dislike:
Be respectful – If you have to work with someone you don't get along with, then it's time to set aside your pride and ego. Treat the person with courtesy and respect, as you would treat anyone else. Just because this person behaves in an unprofessional manner, that doesn't mean you should as well.
Be assertive – If the other person is rude and unprofessional, then firmly explain that you refuse to be treated that way, and calmly leave the situation. Remember, set the example.
To learn more about handling dislike in the workplace, please see Dealing with Difficult People and Egos at Work.
Dealing with disappointment or unhappiness at work can be difficult. Of all the emotions you might feel at work, these are the most likely to impact your productivity. If you've just suffered a major disappointment, your energy will probably be low, you might be afraid to take another risk, and all of that may hold you back from achieving.
Here are some proactive steps you can take to cope with disappointment and unhappiness:
Look at your mindset – Take a moment to realize that things won't always go your way. If they did, life would be a straight road instead of one with hills and valleys, ups and downs, right? And it's the hills and valleys that often make life so interesting.
Adjust your goal – If you're disappointed that you didn't reach a goal, that doesn't mean the goal is no longer reachable. Keep the goal, but make a small change – for example, delay the deadline.
Our Back On Track article provides practical steps for recovering from a major career setback.
Record your thoughts – Write down exactly what is making you unhappy. Is it a co-worker? Is it your job? Do you have too much to do? Once you identify the problem, start brainstorming ways to solve it or work around it. Remember, you always have the power to change your situation.
Smile! – Strange as it may sound, forcing a smile – or even a grimace – onto your face can often make you feel happy (this is one of the strange ways in which we humans are 'wired.') Try it – you may be surprised!
We all have to deal with negative emotions at work sometimes, and learning how to cope with these feelings is now more important than ever. After all, negative emotions can spread, and no one wants to be around a person who adds negativity to a group
Know what causes your negative emotions, and which types of feelings you face most often. When those emotions begin to appear, immediately start your strategy to interrupt the cycle. The longer you wait, the harder it will be to pull yourself away from negative thinking.